So in my efforts to make sense of the world we live in my precocious personable precious people, I am noticing something that I am just now realizing could be a truism. Everyone has “that time of the month.” I don’t care if you are animal, vegetable or mineral. Whether you are a Male, female, hermaphrodite, androgynous or whatever, everyone it seems is susceptible to a time or a brief period of time if you will… (did see what I did there in the previous sentence? – if you didn’t go ask your mom to explain it and leave me alone.) every month where they go total Bitch Cakes!
I do it. I have come to terms with it. I even know that it’s happening and I still seem powerless to stop the “a$$ho$e from doing what it does.” Pooping all over everyone unlucky enough to cross my path. They don’t even need to do anything really. The issue is usually all me. Just going off for no particular reason. This brings about some important questions. Such as: Where is my self control? Don’t I have any maturity? Do I let my emotions run rampant all the time? Where is my self control?! DAMN IT, HOLY CHRIST on a CROUTON! I SAID THAT ALREADY!!!!! See what I mean? Right there I just burst into flames over nothing.
My whole life I was told that being in control is something to strive for. And even though I have tried to do this I am learning that I am not ever really in as much control as I think. In fact, since I can’t control the people who are not me and the fact that I am surrounded by these people who are, once again not me, I face an interesting conundrum. How do I manage to stay sane in a world full of people who want things I don’t, who have their own ideas that are not mine and that disagree with my ideas, people who want to go and do and see when I want to see and go and do.
Recently I crossed the line in front of others and made someone feel like less than the valued person they are. That sucked for both of us. I made them feel like I was attacking them and they responded by calling me names and storming out of the room. And this was at work! Yikes right!? For the past few days this incident has reverberated around my place of work culminating in a meeting with the company CEO giving a group of us a talking to. Double yikes!
So what am I saying here? I am saying that I am more prone to emotional outburst than I used to believe. I have come to accept this about myself and will endeavor to learn humility and the art of a sincere apology. I also hope to be able to give others the benefit of the doubt and to remember everyone has bad days and sometimes that’s all it is and it has nothing to do with me.
Bottom line here is we all have our moments and that just a fact of life, period!